My intense love turned into burden

Hi there, my story might sound commonplace to you, but I don’t know whom to turn to for advice.

Our marriage is almost 10 years old.

The last two years I sense a change in his behavior, but I don’t know where it comes from. His cold attitude and ignorance is making me nervous. He never gave me reasons to be jealous of him so far, but I have certain doubts that he wants his freedom and whenever I try to limit him he gets even more irritated. He usually doesn’t go out alone, only sometimes with friends, as far as I know. But I can't explain why doesn't he share with me and doesn’t want to talk to me like with other women.

He doesn't show any feelings towards me. I often talk about my feelings and constantly repeat how much I care about this marriage. When I see him talk and laugh with another woman I feel painful jealousy.

How can I make him treat me as he treats others, feel his desire to be with me? I think the problem is exactly there.

He wants to be interesting and catching for the others, but as far as I am concerned, he acts as if he doesn’t care.

I can’t seem to decide whether love disappears after so many years of marriage, but why doesn’t it happen to me? I feel very bad when I see him talking to another woman.

I have often thought I should also find someone, but I won’t be happy, I want only him. And I know divorce is not the right decision. I ended all my contacts with friends and family, I only want to go out with him.

This has to change, but it is so difficult. Trust me, I am helpless.

I even searched through his phone, only to prove my doubts, but I found nothing. He is either very discreet or I have no reason to doubt him. I don’t even have the strength to be with another man, I feel so deeply hurt and disappointed.

Thank you in advance!