Do I have a chance for a fresh start?
The author's name is obscured • True stories • Separation • • Add a comment
Hello girls! For some time I have been hesitating in which direction to continue my life, and time passes. I hope to hear your objective opinion. Sometimes things are better seen from the side.
Well, in short - I'm 31, married for many years, we have no children. My husband is not a bad person - he helps me in the household, he is skillful, he does not raise scandals, he does not beat me. But I don't feel happy. The problem is that his only entertainment is beer, TV, and the computer. We don't go out together, we rarely have guests together, we rarely go somewhere as a family. He just has no desire. And he is only 5 years older than me.
And what weighs on me the most - we have sex very rarely - in 2-3 months. And he’s using fatigue, stress, and health problems as an excuse. There doesn't seem to be another, it's just his lethargy. I tried everything - female tricks to seduce, threats, pleas.
It is terribly humiliating to feel unwanted, unattractive, to the person closest to you.
I had come to a divorce decision when a man fell in love with me, and that restored my self-esteem as a woman. I have no future with him, for many reasons, but he is a good friend of mine.
Then I started paying more attention to my appearance, to have fun with friends, I found a hobby, I experienced 2 fleeting relationships. It was just sex, but what…
I think maybe it's good to adopt a child and continue as before, as good roommates, and to look for sex outside. But this is somehow unethical, hypocritical, and where is the love?
Is it too late to start again, to divorce, to look for a man with whom we can have a full-fledged marriage? What if I get worse? Decent men are already busy. And I'm not the perfect woman, after all.
I am afraid of being left alone, without a home, without a child, but now I don’t feel satisfied either. Maybe I want too much. What do you think?